Why?

Sometimes, I wonder why I'm here. Why me? Why do I have this life and not another one? I don't mean that I want another one; I'd say that I'm pretty content with my life. I just want to know why.

When I was younger, I would think about myself and how I came to be what I was. I don't mean biologically. It's hard to describe, but I'll try. I used to picture the way a body got a personality was random. I mean, I knew it wasn't completely random, but I would think that there were, for example, three possible personality candidates for the embryo I used to be. And then one of us would be picked randomly. So it wasn't completely random and yet it kind of was.

Of course, I know that's not how things work, but I thought it was when I was a kid. So I would spend a lot of time trying to think why I was picked or if it was really just something random and I was lucky. I would also wonder if all of this - and by 'this' I mean life - was just a dream. Maybe I didn't know it, but I was actually asleep the whole time.

The point of this post is basically to portray to you all how weird I was as a kid. I still am weird, but at least I know more than I did then about life. I still wonder why though.